Performance anxiety
It took me a long time to learn how to be myself in the bedroom (and we all know that being fully open and vulnerable is what makes sex great).
For starters, I was overcoming some major challenges with performance anxiety early in my life that made sex feel intimidating instead of pleasurable.
But, even without those early challenges, when I think back on my life, I realize that no one ever taught me how to be myself in bed or how to speak up about the things I wanted.
Sure, I was told about sex.
Sure, I was told how it should feel for me.
Hell... I was even shown on-screen how it should look. (I even remember nearly getting caught watching porn by my nosey lil sister!)
But how, where, and when do any of us learn how to make sex great once we start engaging with it in real life? How do we learn to be ourselves in bed?
*crickets*
*more crickets*
*sexier crickets*
The answer is: who the F&$^ knows?
I was all alone trying to figure that out. And I bet you were too.
Though many of us think we know what great sex should look and feel like, most people feel that achieving great sex is an incredibly lonely journey of self-discovery.
That’s because self-discovery is a solo process and sex-discovery is typically focused only on the physical aspects of sex. Those two paths are often kept separate.
Learning about sex usually starts with chatting with friends or family, searching for erotica on the web or social media, experimenting with masturbation, and ultimately just learning from our successes and failures in the bedroom.
But, I’m willing to bet that nobody ever taught you how to have a conversation with yourself, how to figure out what you like, how to decode your fantasies, how to overcome difficult early experiences, how to ask for what you want, and, MOST IMPORTANTLY, how to troubleshoot when things don't work the way you thought they would (in OR out of the bedroom!)
Am I right?
Listen. I get it. It’s why I built this platform.
Learning to have great sex that reflects exactly who you are doesn't have to be a long, complicated process filled with trial and error like it was for me.
Just because most of us haven't taken the time to discover ourselves, communicate our desires effectively, try new things, or reflect on sex after it happens doesn't mean we can't start now.
That's exactly why Feeling Seen exists—to help you do all those things to begin making the pleasure you want and start having better sex–the kind that reflects who you are.
Stay tuned to your inbox next week when I reveal my 5-Step Feeling Seen Formula to Better Sex. (Trust me, you’re not gonna want to miss this!)
Until then.
