Top 5 Tips to Liven Up Your Libido
It is important to rule out any medical issues that may be causing a decrease in libido before attempting any of these suggestions. This is because certain medical conditions can cause a decrease in libido. You should get a full check-up from your medical provider to ensure all possible underlying causes are treated appropriately. If these medical issues are not addressed, any self-directed remedies may not be effective. Additionally, some medical conditions may worsen if left untreated, so it is important to first rule them out.
The Feeling Seen Top 5:
Tips to Liven Your Libido!
1. Masturbation. Self-pleasure is a very healthy activity that helps improve libido and helps you learn your body. When you are comfortable with your own body, it is easier to communicate to a partner how you want to be touched. Masturbation alone can gradually become masturbating in the same room, then watching the other person (mutual masturbation). Watching your partner can be very instructional, and it can be a turn-on. Masturbation is also your downtime...your "me-time." This activity can merely be "stimulation" and not always result in an orgasmic conclusion.
2. Lubrication. If you haven't tried playing with lube, we encourage you to start tonight. Using a good silicone lubricant for all sex play removes the pressure or embarrassment of guessing whether or not you are aroused based on wetness levels. Toss some on your neck, nipples, breasts, stomach, thighs, and butt, and start rubbing it around to heat it. (We're willing to bet you're getting a bit hot just thinking about it.)
3. Communication. Start by reframing your narrative around sex (in other words, how you talk to yourself about what the sexual experience "should be.”) Sex doesn't have to have an endgame. Orgasm doesn't have to be your goal every single time. Some days, all you need is some close touching, other days, you're looking for more. Being able to talk about those desires is what makes everything more desirable.
4. Activation. Increasing your daily or weekly physical activity levels is a great way to support your libido at home. Not only does exercise help keep your body in shape, which helps activate your self-confidence, it also releases endorphins, which can help boost your libido. Choosing an activity that feels safe, comfortable, and supportive of your body is important to ensure your exercise feels empowering and not stressful.
5. Experimentation. Try something new. Trying something new in the bedroom (alone or with your partner) can help spice things up and keep the relationship exciting and vibrant. Experimenting in safe and consensual ways can help bring back the spark and passion that may have been lost over time, contributing to more desire and a livelier libido overall.
Remember, it's normal for a libido (your overall sexual drive or desire for sexual activity) not to be the same every day or consistently match up to your partner. Life happens. Bodies change daily. From time to time, our libidos may be affected by hormone and stress levels, medications, and even relationship dynamics.
The point is that there are a million reasons why libidos shift, change, or pass out in a cozy chair and don't wake up for months. But there’s also a million reasons why it matters enough to keep working at it. Your libido is a part of you and it deserves to be seen, too.
We hope this list has helped spark some ideas to liven it up.
